When a friend has to lie about the fact that a friend did nice things for them to preserve what’s left of their fragile reality in order to prevent more chaos in their world that’s sad. When a friend tells you that you can no longer interact with them and leave positive comments or do nice things for them because it interfered with their life and caused drama in their fragile reality.
When a friend calls you and catches up for hours and ends the conversation by threatening you that if anyone finds out about the conversation they will burn you and have to power to do so this is also sad.
And when I take up my new path my load in life will be lightened as I will not entertain such childish behavior nor do I worry about your opinion and my circle of friends will grow smaller.
When I say I love you to my friends it’s not that I want to peruse a romantic relationship or have other intentions. Love is; wanting to see others achieve their dreams, that they are genuinely happy in life, that they are safe and never experience calamity, that their life is full and rewarding, that they get to know and see the beauties of the world as I have come to know many of them. Love is the thankfulness that you get to be apart of their life and know their happiness and attempt to be there in downtrodden times as a smile and someone always rooting them on.
As a friend, there is no greater feeling than being apart of someone’s life genuinely in spirit and in shared random moments of life. As a friend, I never have to worry about being something I’m not as there are no expectations nor worry about complicating things.
As a friend, I get to genuinely share my world and vise versa with people who may not always find what your interested in as fascinating as you do but know you enough on how to reach out in meaningful and poignant ways at random and clever moments.
These are ideas that I hold as values worth preserving. And so when I let go of your hand and you retort why I tell you. You have besmirched the grand ideas of love and friendship defining them in a strange way that allows only abstract notions acceptable. Maybe I’m wrong but I can not go on being anything more then I am or something I’m not.
I traveled halfway around the world so that I could be apart of my friend’s world and to walk a day in her shoes. I wanted nothing more than to asker her questions regarding art and life. I rose to the occasion and went to her and put forth effort in truly and genuinely being apart of her life. I not only got to have my conversation but I got to have it over a glass of wine along with one of her amazing friendships. Beyond my wildest expectations, I also got to go to the gallery and see it before it opened along with a nice luncheon. Leaving was not easy, but I was thankful for the time that I got to spend with her. We still get together to this day and catch up and share what we have been working on artistically.